“I’m from The Bank”

By Wrongedfellow

With our smart phones we roam the ‘burbs
Taking photos of houses from the curb
“Who is that?” – you draw a blank
Don’t be alarmed – I’m from the bank

I’ll stop by each month for a visit
My job’s to report if somebody’s in it
They only pay six bucks for each “inspection”
It’s hard to find work when you’re on probation

You’ll see the charge as a “BPO”
At two hundred bucks it’s a lot of dough
They make a fortune off my “opinion”
But I’m not a broker, just a minion

I’ll ignore every sign of life I see
And report your house as a “vacancy”
The only insurance you’ll have on your place
Will be three times as much and force placed

Although your home is occupied
I’ll find a reason to come inside
If you hear me give your door a yank
Don’t be alarmed – I’m from the bank

I’ll drink your beer, let the dog outside
It’s the middle of summer but I’ll winterize
I’ll change the locks on all of your doors
Take what I can and come back for more

I wonder how much your TV will bring?
I make extra when I “Safeguard” your things
When it’s your property I’m “preserving”
I’m never charged with breaking and entering

“Call the police!” I’ll say with a swagger
They’ll just say it’s a civil matter
Cops turn a blind eye, whatever their rank
Don’t be surprised – they work for the bank

~

4closureFraud.org